Contemplating marriage as wedding nears
April 5th, 2012 at 7:51 pm by ajcolley under News Blog
Editor’s note: Daybreak Anchor Lauren Lowrey shares her thoughts on marriage as she prepares for her wedding.
Was there a time in your life when you realized something you had long been told wasn’t true? For me, it concerned marriage and relationships. As a kid, I had always heard adults talking about how difficult marriage was. “You have to work at it,” someone would say. “That ‘in-love’ feeling doesn’t last for longer than 2 years, so make sure you really like each other.” I had gone through life thinking relationships were difficult and I would have to work hard to make it last. I never knew what I now hold to be true: Loving the right person is easy.
I was 21 at the time working as a Morning Anchor in my hometown of Myrtle Beach. I had just met the man who is now, six years later, about to become my husband (Read the story of how we met here: http://www.blakeandlauren.com/defaultWebsiteFrame.asp?frame=yes&pageID=763081). From the moment we met, I sensed his balance, humility and kindness. Every moment with him was uplifting and inspiring. With him, I was confident. I had a settled feeling in my soul – the kind of ease that only comes with the deep trust, love and appreciation for another person. Was our love enough to make an enduring commitment to each other? Absolutely.
But it seems my commitment puts me in the minority. According to a recent study (http://www.pewsocialtrends.org/2011/12/14/barely-half-of-u-s-adults-are-married-a-record-low/?src=prc-headline) by the Pew Research Center, just 20% of adults ages 18 to 29 are married, compared with 59% in 1960. Maybe the striking failure rate of most marriages spooked my generation, making them reluctant to even try. But that’s where I’m puzzled. Why would someone exclude themselves from the most meaningful part of life?
So, in order to make the inception of this meaningful commitment more memorable, my fiancé and I decided to do a small destination wedding at an Irish country estate called Castle Leslie (http://www.castleleslie.com/). After living in three different cities together, we knew planning a state-side wedding would be much larger than we could handle. We found a small, intimate wedding to be much more appealing. Not only would it be a vacation for us, but for all of our guests as well (not to mention, an exceptional opportunity to travel: out of the 28 of us traveling for the wedding, only 5 have ever been to Ireland). We’ll spend two weeks exploring Ireland and England; laughing, loving and spending time together as husband and wife.
If you’re wondering our strategy on how we intend to make our marriage last:
1. We’ll continue to write love letters to each other every day (yes, I said continue).
2. We’ll say “I love you” every chance we get.
3. We’ll explore the world together and make every day an adventure.
4. We’ll uphold a perfect trust through fidelity out of respect for each other.
After all, we’re not just spouses, we’re best friends, and all the curve balls in life can’t separate two people who fiercely love, honor and cling to each other.
Lauren,
Your words are absolutely beautiful. I wish you and Blake a long and happy life together as one.
Blessings,
David Hurd
P.S. I know you both are breaking many hearts!!!
Lauren, That was beautiful, as well as very true. Jim and I have been married for 26yrs in May and it is just as great now as it was then…Love and Respect for each other are very important in a marriage…We wish our favorite dance instructor a wonderful wedding day and a wonderful life with her wonderful man..
Lauren,I am soooo happy for you!
Lauren, my husband and I have been married for almost 43 years. It hasn’t been easy. We’ve had hard times. But he has been my best friend. We met in high school. My advice is, never go to bed mad at each other. Always kiss and make up before going to bed. I wish you much happiness. Congratulations.
Been married 20 years, still waiting for it to start being “hard”. Oh, times get hard, problems come up, but our marriage is the easiest thing we’ve ever done. I give the same advice to everyone–just divide everything into “inside” and “outside” problems. “Outside” is things like relatives, taxes, jobs, car repairs, sickness, etc. “Inside” problems are things like drugs, infidelity, abuse, neglect. “Outside” problems can’t divide you–you face them together. Just don’t allow yourselves to have any “inside” problems.
Very beautiful! Commitment today is rare. Marriage is hard work though, no matter who you are. Thats why most dont stick with it. My husband and I are very dedicated Christians and believe in standing by our vows. We know without a doubt we were meant for each other. But we are two unique individuals with different perspectives, thoughts and ideas, that often disagree and it is hard work to communicate and compromise.
To everyone who responded — thanks for sharing. Your words are so encouraging as we head into this special time. I can’t wait to marry my best friend. R.C — what you wrote is excellent (“inside” and “outside” problems). Thank you!
Congrats Lauren and Blake…..you are really a joy to watch in the mornings, Lauren!
Wow to start in Myrtle Besch and come to Indiana….at least you had an easy forest winter hear. I have been married to my best friend for 7 1/2 years…..it has had it’s challenges but never “hard”. Remember that there is a third “person” in your marriage and always seek His will in your lives.
Enjoy Ireland and this incredible journey you are embarking on!
Live, laugh, love …I wish you both a life of joy and, happiness.
Loren, please take his last name.
Lauren: We always knew you would be successful in whatever you chose to do…we are happy for you and glad you all get to go to Ireland with family and friends to celebrate your wedding….